One of the toughest things we have encountered as foster parents is the constant statement, “I want to go home with mommy.” The endless questioning of, “When is mommy coming?” It’s hard being constantly reminded that these children are in great suffering. A warning: You can get to the point of feeling irritated and frustrated toward the child at what may seem like constant nagging, but remember that they are children. Check yourself constantly and bring it back to their hurt. This has been the case for the past couple of nights at our home.
Then came Friday night. For the first time since placement, Zoe Girl (ZG) did not continue asking about mommy or going home. She asked only once and seemed satisfied with our answer. We left the room and the door ajar. A couple of minutes later, to our surprise, he hear ZG singing… I walked over the door and heard her singing the following: “ZG and ZB going to mommy home… la la la la la… we gonna sing and dance… la la la la la…”
There were some mixed feelings as we heard her sing. We were amused to hear her sing for the first time. Sad for the words we hear hearing. We were witnessing the innocence of a child and our heart was broken at the thought that something like this is going on for her and so many other children. Another part of us was also comforted to know that she was using her inner coping resources to soothe herself to sleep.
It’s moments like these that give meaning to being a foster parent. It’s seeing with your own eyes, that your home brings comfort and safety to a child in need. Now, we have good days and then… well, not so good days, but on those not so good days, we think back on nights like this and we feel refreshed. We thank the Lord for His daily strength and wisdom with these little ones. We depend on God for continued guidance and discernment to make the best decisions for the sake of these children. We know he will see us through.
We Want to Hear from You! – What are some of the nightly struggles you have had with your little ones? What did you do to help the child cope?